Dead Hot
06.04.10
The sun has only been up for an hour or two and already it is bright enough to hurt my eyes. Well, one of my eyes I should say – the other is swollen shut. I am feeling hotter by the minute, as the rocks absorb every ray of sunlight and blast it back out in all directions. All I can see, at least as far as I am able to turn my head, is rock. White colours mixed with light, reddish brown hues come to an abrupt halt at the top of the rockface, where the cloudless Mediterranean sky takes over and wraps me up in a bubble from which there is no escape.
I try to decide which part of me hurts more: the broken nose and jawbone; the arm, dislocated from its shoulder, that is trapped under my back as I lie here; my ankles, which are bent at impossible angles; or the kneecap which… no, I don’t want to think about the kneecap. I expect soon the pain of all these will be dwarfed by the midday sun lashing at me, blistering my skin and draining my body of all its fluids. A heatwave was forecast for the next few days, and as I think the temperature is in the late twenties even so early in the morning, I have no doubt it will reach the heights of 47 degrees, as predicted.
I remember reading that death from heatstroke can come about quite quickly; this gives me some comfort, but it is not enough. I have failed in my mission, despite being so close, and this is what hurts more than all my broken bones combined. I promised my client I would find his daughter and return her safely to him. Find her I did, after a long and winding journey across Western Europe and an unfruitful visit to St Petersburg before finally arriving in Athens, hot on the girl’s trail. Once I’d located her, I came up with a plan to break her out of where she was being held captive – a foolproof plan, I assured her father. I had not a single doubt that it would work. It appears that even in this day and age the gods of Olympus do not look kindly upon hubris.
I look at the rockface, which seems to go on and on. Its surface looks unnatural, as if it has been chipped away by an enormous implement. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I think of marble – I’m in a marble quarry. There are a few outside Athens; I even saw one on the flight over, as the plane was making its descent to Venizelos airport. It was the size of a suburb or two; it could well be the one I find myself dying in now. A feeling of hope suddenly strikes me – workers could be arriving soon – but it dies again in an instant as I remember that it is the 15th August, a national holiday which sees all of the city deserted in favour of the islands. I look at the endless sea of blue that envelopes the quarry, with me in it, and think of lying on a beach. I think of a cool blue sea and a gentle breeze, and doze off – or pass out.
I wake up to a sun that is high in the sky; I have to squint as no matter which way I try to turn my head, my gaze cannot escape its fierce light. My breath comes out in rapid, short gasps and I wonder where I am. I try to move and the pain that shoots through my entire body is white hot like the ball of fire high above me. My skin is red raw; I must get out of the sun. Have I fallen asleep on a beach? I must get up and walk into that blue sea that is all around me. I see ripples in it, but I feel no breeze – maybe it is the heat rising from the sun-beaten beach. I will get up, and walk into the sea to cool my burning body. I will get up. In a minute.
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Tags: Athens, Flash Fiction, fridayflash, Heatstroke, Marble, Quarry, Writing
“It appears that even in this day and age the gods of Olympus do not look kindly upon hubris.” – what a great line that is Mazzz!
You know I’m a sucker for anything set in Greece, the play of the modern against the classical and mythological. This story works supremely well. I don’t know, something about him being quarried out of a block of marble, but one that went horribly wrong and deformed came to my mind. Or he’s all the parings of the marble chipped away to leave a breathtaking & achingly beautiful statue that he’s been ripped away from & can’t see (sort of like conjoined twins separated, but one can’t survive on its own). Okay I’ll shut up now. Other than to say I enjoyed this.
Marc Nash
You’ve described the heat & sun so well I can see it, yet the story as a whole makes me shiver. The last paragraph is wonderful, particularly the last line. This is a lovely piece, even describing death.
My skin feels hot just reading this. Poor guy! And I’m interested to find out what happens to the girl he failed to rescue. This stands alone, but that might make an interesting follow up story.
Really well done.
Loved the opening, the slow reveal, the gradual realization that Mr Somebody was NOT in a good situation. Stunning M!
Apt title. I’m glad I read this in the cool of the morning! Awesome, Maria!
A slow death, for reasons unknown.
Great writing, loved it.
My skin blistered just reading this. I felt like I was in the story. And the last three words put me inside the protagonist’s head.
I too, hope you continue and let us know about the captive girl.
Oooh. Unsettling. The last paragraph in particular made me shiver. Very strong descriptions here, it made me wish for summer! Heh.
Mazzz…
As always… I love it. The heat. The sun. “I will get up, in a minute.” That line ends it perfect and packs a big punch.
Nice.
Jim.
Gripping description of a situation I can only imagine! Well-titled, too. Most are out enjoying their national holiday, while someone dies of horrific injuries in the heat. Wonderful flash!
You know, even with all those broken bones and baking in the harsh sun…I somehow feel this guy is a hero and he’s going to make it out of there. Wishful thinking?
Great piece. Poor guy. I hope Shannon’s right!
Ooooh, I like this. I hate the heat to the point that if it’s warm enough to go swimming, I’m inside in front of a fan eating ice cream. So this REALLY freaked me out. The delirium, the backtracking, the gradual slowing down of the entire thought process… superb. And unsettling. I’m going to sprint from air-conditioned building to air-conditioned building today!
“It appears that even in this day and age the gods of Olympus do not look kindly upon hubris.” < I'd plucked this out as I was wiping the sweat from where sweat oozes when feeling what/how you explained with such "being there" tour de force Maria … and then found the Nash had Marc'd it too. SUPERB LINE in quite a symbolic way.
Marble … immobile … and let's not speak about that kneecap. PLEASE oh please bring on what happens when he/she gets up. ~ Brava! Absolutely*Kate
You are a master of description. Wonderful, in a painful way. LOL Well done. 🙂
Those last two short sentences say so much about the (delusional) human spirit when faced with death. I like that this stands alone, yet alludes to something much larger.
You’re firing on all cylinders Mazz.
What a hook the first two sentences are. No way am I going to stop reading after those. And, like Marc, I loved the line about hubris. Just brilliant.
The sense of calm sadness pervading this piece made for wonderful reading. I’m happy for your MC that delirium set in at the end. It will make what happens next easier (I hope).
Really well done.
Standing ovation! All your descriptions drew me in, but what you didn’t tell was just as compelling, maybe even more so. The intense heat and your character’s delirium were spot on. Thank you for sharing this. ~ Olivia
Gripping story, mazzz. You painted the scene very well, and I could feel the heat and the pain in his bones. Great job!
Great descriptions and I love how the back story comes out slowly, though never fully. I will no longer complain about being hot!
Oh, I feel terrible for the agony he must be in. 🙁 Know it’s just a story but I am a wuss that way.
You are on fire with this story! Great description throughout and, yes, the gods of Olympus can be very cruel.
A gripping tale so wonderfully told. The description gives that wonderful sensual evocation and throws into relief the character’s predicament.
Felt the heat, the parched-ness, being so close to water. Despite all the hot, your story gives me the shivers in the way of best horror. Fabu writing. Peace…
You’ve captured the last few minutes of life here very well. It’d be interesting to see where this all went wrong, since it was supposed to be foolproof. Good story!
Great, gripping story which propels the reader forward. Couldn’t stop if I wanted to…and I didn’t want to. This one snatches us by the lapels and screams in our faces, puts us right there in with the narrator, sweating, passing out, stabbing aches… fantastic job!
This one was so claustrophobic and painful… smashing flash
When I saw 47 degrees I was a bit confused. Later when you revealed the location it all made sense. When it gets up over 100 degrees (Fahrenheit) where I am, being out and about becomes unbearable. Being trapped in a place that absorbs all that heat and radiates it back at you must be absolute torture.
Thanks for sharing.
This is a gripping read, Maria. Excellent descriptions, both of his physical setting and his state of mind. I am left intrigued as to how he came to be there (an accident or dumped), if he makes it or not (not looking good, but I’m hoping), and not least of all, the fate of the girl. Nice work.
~jon
Poor guy… I wanted better for him at the end, but I guess heroes’ stories don’t always end well. Kinda like that Prometheus guy whose liver kept getting eating out of him as punishment for bringing fire to humanity.
I have special sympathy for him right now, too, being in San Antonio, Texas, where the temp is upper 90’s, over 100 F with the heat index.
CD
“I remember reading that death from heatstroke can come about quite quickly; this gives me some comfort”
Oh, it’s bad that I have thoughts like that. Bad that I have lived through situations that warranted them, bad that I have had them far more frequently for far less dramatic situations. I’ve had the comfort-of-quick-death thought on a treadmill.
Like Jon said, it’s a gripping work. Glad to have you back, Maria (though you’e always Mazz in my head).
Superb story. I’m feeling a little overheated myself now. Poor guy.
Just simply excellent writing.
Wow, I have so many questions. You are so good like that. You had me aching to my very core. How does it end?
~2
I could feel the blistering heat as I read this, and considering where I live, that’s quite a feat. Fabulous description.