04.18.13
The problem with reincarnation is that the process gets utterly tedious after the first couple of times. I am now about to enter my ninth lifetime and am seriously considering asking the Powers That Be to remove me from the roster of Conscious Reincarnation. I have come to envy those that flit from one existence to the next, unaware of their previous lives except maybe at some primal level.
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08.19.10
“Now then, chaps.”
“Matt!”
“Well, if it ain’t the Lord of the Winds!”
“Not seen you since you got together with that bird. Was beginning to think you were dead. Or, worse, under the thumb.”
“Give him a break lads, he’s probably just been spending the last few weeks in bed.”
Matt winked at us, tapped the side of his nose, cocked one hip towards us and let out a loud fart. The underage drinkers at the next table stifled giggles while the barmaid, far too fashionable for an establishment like the Pig and Whistle, wrinkled her nose in disgust.
“Business as usual, chaps!” Matt brought his glass up for the customary salute, but the rest of us didn’t follow suit, instead looking at him in horror.
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07.29.10
“Mum, I’m taking the fish for a walk.”
“Okay, but be back in time for dinner.”
When Tommy was five years old, his parents had taken him to a Greek island on holiday. His memories of it were rather vague, consisting mainly of sandcastles built and then promptly destroyed in glee, but one incident was still crystal clear in his mind. They had been sitting in a taverna by the harbour, and a boat with two fishermen had moored a few feet from their table. One of the men had jumped to shore carrying a small shark, harpoon still sticking out of it. On seeing Tommy’s eyes widen, the man smiled at him and lowered the fish so he could take a closer look. He still remembered its intense dark eyes, and how smooth it had been to the touch. Read the rest of this entry »
04.02.10
The writing prompt here is: page 247 of a biography, fictional or otherwise. This is an extract of the biography of JS Tycho, noted 25th Century physicist.
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It was this, rather than his unfortunate mutation, that instilled such fear into the alien would-be conquerors of the Colony. They left almost as quickly as they had arrived, and he was declared saviour of the moons of Epsilon Eridani b. Numerous attempts were made to convince him to run for office, but he steadfastly refused.
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03.26.10
The story I was initially aiming to post for today’s #fridayflash didn’t seem to want to be finished yesterday. Instead, have something silly (well, sillier than my usual…).
It was written as an exercise for the Writers faction of the Leeds Savage Club, inspired by Edgar Allen Poe’s How to Write a Blackwood Article:
1. If you mean ‘bread and butter’, do not by any means say it outright. You may say anything and everything leading up to and around it. But if ‘bread and butter’ be your real meaning, be cautious, and never say it.
2. Every article must include a misquoted French, Latin or Greek saying, such as the use of ‘cul – de – sac’ in the article ‘The Spanish Fly who Never Stopped Dancing’ : “I put my good dancing ability down to being born with a certain cul-de-sac….”
3. The article must be, objectively and positively, absolute nonsense!
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01.15.10
“Daddy, I broke my stick. Can I have another one?” Tessie asked, ponytail swinging as she hopped from one foot to another to emphasise her need for a new stick. She knew he wouldn’t refuse her, but the action earned her an even bigger smile.
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11.27.09
I have only been dead for a week and already I’ve been summoned to see the Beast. Woodhouse shakes his head in that despairing way of his.
“I’ve been here for two years and he’s not asked to see me once”, he says, in his best underdog voice. Woodhouse is such a likeable fellow that no one can figure out why he hasn’t been moved up a long time ago, let alone why he was sent to a hub as low as Hub 12 in the first instance. We can’t ask him what he did to be brought here, of course – it is not the done thing. In prison, everyone may be innocent, but here we all know better. Nevertheless, in Woodhouse’s case one cannot help but think that he might be an anomaly. Even the Beast himself is perplexed by the chap’s presence, as I am about to find out.
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11.20.09
The combination of 4 inch stiletto heels, cobblestone pavement and an attempt to fish out a cigarette packet from an overflowing handbag proved too much for her inner ear; she toppled over and felt the sharp pain of a twisted ankle. When she looked up and saw Death standing over her with his hand outstretched, she nearly had a heart attack.
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